Recipe for a Fine Son

Our family had both the privilege and the pleasure to travel to Spangdahlem Air Base in the days following Jamin's death. There we were able to meet his wonderful friends and co-workers, and hear their words about our son and his Air Force life. (Oh how he loved that place and those people!) At one point, Capt. Steven Abate remarked to me, "All I know is, my wife wants your recipe for a son like that!". Two sleepless nights followed, and allowed me some time to think about what he had said, and below is the result...

RECIPE FOR A FINE SON
In memory of Lt Jamin Buchanan Wilson

Take one man, who is trustworthy and good,
and one woman, who believes raising children
IS a career,
and blend them together in marriage,
committed for a lifetime.

In time, add the main ingredient -a baby boy,
(which comes in gift form)
and hold him close until he feels secure,
and feed him regularly so that he can trust.
Generously sprinkle in siblings if you are able.
(I used one brother and two sisters).
Mix them together vigorously
by having them share -- chores...play...a bedroom.

-Add in varied amounts:
more books than television,
more outings to the park than to the mall,
more creative thinking than pat answers,
more joyful anticipation
than fear of what is not known.

While this mixture is brewing,
pour in genuine praise as often as possible
and loving punishment
in small but necessary droplets.
And tell him you love him... often

Then measure -
the value of extended family
and of teachers and coaches who care,
adding this generously to the above.
Watch closely for gifts and talents to
bubble to the surface
and when they appear, be careful not to pop them.
For they must be allowed to grow in size indefinitely.

In a separate container gather many friends,
being sure to sort through them thoughtfully.
Set aside any who have soured from negative behavior
or become pitted by careless living
before blending in.
Watch daily for spoilage, and remove it immediately when it appears.
Be sure to make room for this mixture in your home.
Then shake in experiences exuberantly;
travel, the arts, the outdoors,
and teamwork and team play,
for they add a great deal
to the color and flavor of a life.

To finish, find a container (but not a mold)
much larger than yourself--
preferably one that is flexible.
Pat in a generous base of faith in God’s plan,
and prayerfully pour everything in over this,
including a part of yourself.
Then take a step back
and allow your son to grow and mature,
but DO NOT set a timer.
You are nearly finished.

When you can see that your work is done,
gently release this masterpiece to his calling,
asking only that he give back to others
in great proportion.
And tell him again that you love him... like crazy.

Then go and sit quietly,
close your eyes, and inhale deeply,
and savor the incredible aroma
of a fine young son.
-RLW